Sunday, 25 August 2013

A MOTHER'S PLIGHT

On May 31 1998, I was blessed with a beautiful 8 pound baby girl, who I decided to name Aerial "Tater bug" she is the light and joy of my life.

She was raised solely by me as a single mom for 9 years even during the time we spent in Foster care, I went through the Job Corps program from April, 2000 until July, 2001 where I graduated with my GED and Cna (certified nursing assistant ) during the time I was in Job Corp I had a lot of problems, ranging from my baby girl having to have emergency brain surgery at 2 years old, to even some disciplinary issues.

I finally got myself together and knew Tater needed mommy and I graduated. Did everything Dcs told me to, from having a job, continuing visitation and a stable, suitable living environment. I did just that, and on Oct 17, 2001 I was granted full legal custody of Aerial.

Her father Mark Cooper lost his parental rights on that day, as I continued my journey as a single mom, Aerial was a happy healthy little girl. We had our trials, and dating for me was a nightmare because I wanted only the best in her life and in mine too, and in 2003 is where I thought I found my soul mate, and for 5 years he was until the morning my nightmare began.

I was out running errands and my cell started to ring it was the school calling and asking me to come up there, that it was an emergency so I immediately went to the school, and I was placed into a conference room surrounded by investigators and Dcs workers then I was informed about allegations of sexual abuse and they were made against my at the time fiancé, whom I'd been in a relationship with for nearly 5 years. Once I got word of the allegations even though I trusted in my gut nothing happened, because the two were never left alone.

I left without having a place to go, she stayed with a friend then was placed into Foster care because her and I couldn't see eye to eye on things that previously happened between myself and my mother regarding the safety and well being of Aerial (my daughter), which caused me to lose a good job, as I was a trainee for management at McDonalds, all because I had no child care.

And because of which I had no where to go and so she was later placed in the hands of her father, he was never apart of her life and he lost his rights in 2001 I stressed all of this to judge and the Dcs workers they answered me with, well would you rather her stay in Foster care, or go with family. I told them she didn't know him and he lost his rights to her, they didn't listen, she was placed with him and his family.

Over the course of 6 years I have only been allowed to see her twice and only now am I allowed to talk to her twice a week because Dcs is involved because since she has been in Tn with her father and his family she has been raped twice, she has an STD that is only treatable not curable, she has told me that she has been "spanked" by his now soon to be ex wife with different objects leaving bruises and welts on her legs and also that she suffered a heat stroke back in 2010. She was only 12 years old.

One of the sickos who raped her sadly is the man she calls father, I now fight to bring her back home, where she was once happy healthy and safe. I have paperwork showing where she was taken from me on allegations. This is the reason I started Aerials voice, because I will stand and be her voice even if I have to use my last breath to get our point across. 

Dcs robbed my child's life, they endangered her in more ways than one, they keep telling me that because I live in a different state, than where she is is the reason it's so hard for them to allow her to come home, but see when he was given custody of her in 07 the state of South Carolina and the state of Tennessee had no problem taking her from me and transferring the case to Tennessee where she now resides with her father, where her childhood has been robbed from her. 

Please be her voice and help me bring her to a safe home.  

Visit Aerials Voice page on Facebook and help Michele in the journey to bring her daughter Aerial back to a safe place.

Below are the documents proving the allegations.






Thursday, 22 August 2013

HOW EMPOWERING WOMEN CAN DECREASE WORLD POVERTY

“Women make up half of the world's population and yet represent a staggering 70% of the world's poor...” 
                                                                        - Global Poverty Info Bank (2013) -

How could this be? Sadly, it starts from birth. When families favor males, young girls are sometimes left to die, be malnourished, or suffer from untreated medical conditions.
 
Image courtesy: akhilak.com
In many cultures, genital mutilation is done with maternal consent, leading to a life full of pain, infection, and in many cases, death. If they make it to working years, they are often underpaid and overworked. 

In fact, according to GPIB, on average, women make half of what men make (2013). Many women are encouraged to stay home and do work around the house. In this case, women don’t have the same opportunity for education.

When gender inequality takes a toll on women, some will turn to prostitution or other informal work for pay, which makes them extremely vulnerable to exploitation, violence, rape, murder, or sex slavery (GPIB, 2013).

Empowering women can lead to more gender equality in the world. Empowering women can also help encourage economic growth nationwide in countries with extreme gender inequalities because working women contribute more to the economy (Kerbo, 2006). 


SO WHAT DOES EMPOWERING WOMEN MEAN?
There are many ways to empower women. Here are some of large scale types:

Empowering women means advocating against early child marriage.
o   Prevention of early child marriage leads to less health complications and less child birthing related deaths
o    Discouraging early marriage will lead to a lower national population, which means more food and money to go around
o    If children wait to get married, more women will get educated, giving them more career options. If a woman can get a good job, she won’t need to marry into a new family.
o   In most cases, women who don’t get married as children have a higher life satisfaction.
(Child Brides: Stole Lives, 2007)
·         
    Empowering women means encouraging and promoting education.
o   With education, women are more likely to get good, steady jobs, so they will pay back their loans (Kerbo, 2006).
o   With education, women are more likely to use birth control, keeping the population in control as well, which also benefits the national economics (Kerbo, 2006).
o   According to World Bank, “an extra year of secondary schooling for girls can increase their future wages by 10 to 20 % (World Bank, 2011).”

What else can you do to empower women close to you?
o   Promote women’s political rights and participation
o   Teach girls to empower each other from a young age
o   Believe in them and help them find necessary resources to move forward
o   Get involved with an organization or just spread the word!

Many people still don’t realize that gender inequality exists. Likewise, many women don’t realize their lives (or their children’s lives) could be better with a few changes.

Written by: Tristyne Brindle
Community Service


WORKS CITED


Kerbo,  H. (2006). World poverty: Global inequality and the modern world system. New York: McGraw Hill. Pg 47-49.

Sunday, 18 August 2013

THROUGH A RAPIST EYE'S : A MUST READ

Friends,
Please take 5 minutes and read this, then pass it on to friends you think need to be aware of this !

Through a rapist’s eyes. A group of rapists and date rapists in prison were interviewed on what they look for in a potential victim and here are some interesting facts:

1] The first thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle. They are most likely to go after a woman with a ponytail, bun! , braid, or other hairstyle that can easily be grabbed. They are also likely to go after a woman with long hair. Women with short hair are not common targets.

2] The second thing men look for is clothing. They will look for women who’s clothing is easy to remove quickly. Many of them carry scissors around to cut clothing.

3] They also look for women using their cell phone, searching through their purse or doing other activities while walking because they are off guard and can be easily overpowered.

4] The number one place women are abducted from / attacked at is shopping parking lots.

5] Number two is office parking lots/garages.

6] Number three is public restrooms.

7] The thing about these men is that they are looking to grab a woman and quickly move her to a second location where they don’t have to worry about getting caught.

8] If you put up any kind of a fight at all, they get discouraged because it only takes a minute or two for them to realize that going after you isn’t worth it because it will be time-consuming.

9] These men said they would not pick on women who have umbrellas, or other similar objects that can be used from a distance, in their hands.

10] Keys are not a deterrent because you have to get really close to the attacker to use them as a weapon. So, the idea is to convince these guys you’re not worth it.


POINTS THAT WE SHOULD REMEMBER:

1] If someone is following behind you on a street or in a garage or with you in an elevator or stairwell, look them in the face and ask them a question, like what time is it, or make general small talk: can’t believe it is so cold out here, we’re in for a bad winter. Now that you’ve seen their faces and could identify them in a line- up, you lose appeal as a target.

2] If someone is coming toward you, hold out your hands in front of you and yell Stop or Stay back! Most of the rapists this man talked to said they’d leave a woman alone if she yelled or showed that she would not be afraid to fight back. Again, they are looking for an EASY target.

3] If you carry pepper spray (this instructor was a huge advocate of it and carries it with him wherever he goes,) yelling I HAVE PEPPER SPRAY and holding it out will be a deterrent.

4] If someone grabs you, you can’t beat them with strength but you can do it by outsmarting them. If you are grabbed around the waist from behind, pinch the attacker either under the arm between the elbow and armpit or in the upper inner thigh – HARD. One woman in a class this guy taught told him she used the underarm pinch on a guy who was trying to date rape her and was so upset she broke through the skin and tore out muscle strands the guy needed stitches. Try pinching yourself in those places as hard as you can stand it; it really hurts.

5] After the initial hit, always go for the groin. I know from a particularly unfortunate experience that if you slap a guy’s parts it is extremely painful. You might think that you’ll anger the guy and make him want to hurt you more, but the thing these rapists told our instructor is that they want a woman who will not cause him a lot of trouble. Start causing trouble, and he’s out of there.

6] When the guy puts his hands up to you, grab his first two fingers and bend them back as far as possible with as much pressure pushing down on them as possible. The instructor did it to me without using much pressure, and I ended up on my knees and both knuckles cracked audibly.

7] Of course the things we always hear still apply. Always be aware of your surroundings, take someone with you if you can and if you see any odd behavior, don’t dismiss it, go with your instincts. You may feel little silly at the time, but you’d feel much worse if the guy really was trouble.


FINALLY, PLEASE REMEMBER THESE AS WELL ….

1. Tip from Tae Kwon Do: The elbow is the strongest point on your body. If you are close enough to use it, do it.

2. Learned this from a tourist guide to New Orleans : if a robber asks for your wallet and/or purse, DO NOT HAND IT TO HIM. Toss it away from you…. chances are that he is more interested in your wallet and/or purse than you and he will go for the wallet/purse. RUN LIKE MAD IN THE OTHER DIRECTION!

3. If you are ever thrown into the trunk of a car: Kick out the back tail lights and stick your arm out the hole and start waving like crazy. The driver won’t see you but everybody else will. This has saved lives.

4. Women have a tendency to get into their cars after shopping, eating, working, etc., and just sit (doing their checkbook, or making a list, etc. DON’T DO THIS! The predator will be watching you, and this is the perfect opportunity for him to get in on the passenger side, put a gun to your head, and tell you where to go. AS SOON AS YOU CLOSE the DOORS , LEAVE.

5. A few notes about getting into your car in a parking lot, or parking garage:

a. Be aware: look around your car as someone may be hiding at the passenger side , peek into your car, inside the passenger side floor, and in the back seat. ( DO THIS TOO BEFORE RIDING A TAXI CAB) .
In the Philippines the tactic is now that as soon as you get in a Taxi two men will jump in on either side locking you in. Mainly this is a robbery but it can turn. This is a concern for authorities, Again be careful when taking a taxi alone and be on your guard. 

b. If you are parked next to a big van, enter your car from the passenger door. Most serial killers attack their victims by pulling them into their vans while the women are attempting to get into their cars.

c. Look at the car parked on the driver’s side of your vehicle, and the passenger side. If a male is sitting alone in the seat nearest your car, you may want to walk back into the mall, or work, and get a guard/policeman to walk you back out. IT IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN SORRY. (And better paranoid than dead.)

6. ALWAYS take the elevator instead of the stairs. (Stairwells are horrible places to be alone and the perfect crime spot).

7. If the predator has a gun and you are not under his control, ALWAYS RUN! The predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in 100 times; And even then, it most likely WILL NOT be a vital organ. RUN!

8. As women, we are always trying to be sympathetic: STOP IT! It may get you raped, or killed. Ted Bundy, the serial killer, was a good-looking, well-educated man, who ALWAYS played on the sympathies of unsuspecting women. He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often asked “for help” into his vehicle or with his vehicle, which is when he abducted his next victim.

Send this to any woman you know that may need to be reminded that the world we live in has a lot of crazies in it and it’s better safe than sorry.

If u have compassion re-blog this post.
‘Helping hands are better than Praying Lips’ – give us your helping hand.


THIS COULD ACTUALLY SAVE A LIFE.

Submitted by a: 
Security, Health & Safety Consultant

Tuesday, 13 August 2013

HEART DISEASE & STRESS

WHAT IS HEART DISEASE?
Heart disease is any serious illness affecting the heart and causing it to not function as it should.

WHAT IS CHRONIC STRESS?
Chronic stress is the response to emotional pressure suffered for a prolonged period over which an individual perceives he or she has no control.


Unmanaged stress or chronic stress can lead to heart disease because stress leads to high blood pressure, elevated cholesterol and a change in clotting patterns which could lead to a heart attack . Always go for heart check ups regularly and never ignore any heart pains.

HOW STRESS CAN BE STRESSING
Stress is an ordinary condition with some stress even being positive for daily life. However, ways of dealing with stress vary with individuals and thus different results.
In some instances stress makes the situation worse e.g;
Reacting to stress through anger
Moodiness
Anxiety
Creates tension
Mental break down
Heart disease etc.

HOW TO CONTROL STRESS
qAvoid what makes you stressed.
qSet Priorities and focus on them one at a time. Practice time management.
qKnow when to stop worrying.
q Exercise and eat a balanced diet.
qJournal all your feelings.
qAvoid pessimism and be optimistic about life.
qDo not alienate yourself and spend time with your positive friends and family.
qDo what you love but avoid perfectionism.
q Give up unhealthy ways of coping with stress such as alcoholism, smoking, self harm.
qDo not release your stress on others e.g. through anger or alienation or in any negative way.
qFind a positive way to cope with stress.


Have you been dealing with a lot of stress lately? What do you do to make sure this stress does not become uncontrollable? Let us know by leaving a comment or sending an email to: safetyfirstforgirls@aol.com 

You may also like:

HAVE A BALANCED SELF ESTEEM

DEPRESSION AND HOW TO FACE IT

HOW TO MAKE SMART CHOICES

Sunday, 4 August 2013

SAFETY OF THE HEART

steveauthieratheisehill.blogspot.com
WHAT IS THE HEART?
THE PHYSICAL HEART: The heart is the central element of a human being responsible for the heart beat which is essential for a humans survival. The heart pumps blood to the rest of the body.

THE EMOTIONAL HEART: The emotional heart is the part that mirrors how we feel. Even though it cannot be seen, the heart rate can increase or decrease depending on what we see, hear, feel or perceive. The emotional heart experiences our pains and joys.

WHAT IS HEART HEALTH?
Heart health is having a healthy heart.

Put your hand on your chest. What do you feel? How does the heart feel when you are very excited or very disappointed? 

The physical heart needs to be kept safe in order to avoid heart failure; which can also be caused by the emotional heart.

The emotional heart being core to our emotional state is thus vulnerable to feelings of love, hate, pain, joy, jealousy or  trust among a lot of other.

Safety of the heart is crucial when it comes to matters of the heart because it allows for balance of the heart; It helps us to avoid closing our hearts to life just to be safe when we face trouble and also helps us avoid leaving our hearts out in the open when we want love or acceptance and so much more.

Safety of the heart denotes to measures taken in order to protect from injury or harm the health of a person’s emotional and physical heart.

Safety of the heart signifies good heart health and awareness on heart issues. Some factors that can affect safety of the heart are:
ØHeart Disease
ØHypertension 
ØHeart Break
ØLove and Trust Issues
ØSadistic personality disorder
ØEtc.


What are you doing to make sure your physical and emotional heart are healthy? Let us know today by leaving us a comment or sending us an email at: safetyfirstforgirls@aol.com

YOU MAY ALSO LIKE: