By Amanda Arambulo via UN Volunteers
The darkest part of life is losing someone you love. I want to let you know that you shall get through this. This does not mean that you will be able to bring back your loved one or even forget the pain that came with losing them.
It means that while they are still gone, you will grow from the experience, yes how painful it is, but it will make you see the world a lot differently. It is not something we ask for but as long as we are mortal, we will keep losing and losing but that should not mean that all is lost.
When you have lost a loved one, allow yourself to grieve, in your own way and for as long as you like. No one can ever truly understand the pain in your soul but allow others to support you in such a dark time.
It is okay to feel cheated especially if you lost your loved one at an unexpected time or departed on bad terms but never carry guilt over someone who has passed on. Instead, focus on the strong points of the relationship you had with your loved one, those are the memories to hold on to. It is understandable that the last memory stands outs most but remember life is a journey and it is soothing to embrace each step your loved one went through in their life.
Now be mindful that death is not the only way to lose a loved one. You could lose a loved one through alienation, bitter conflict or maybe they just chose to leave on their own and abandoned you. Remember that a relationship is between two people, so if your loved one left you, do not hold it against yourself.
Take your time to heal from losing a loved one, be careful if you feel like giving away their possessions in case you might want them later. Cherish all the memories that came with your loved one and then move on.
If your loved one had been around, you would have moved on and while we are uncertain about the afterlife, it is certain that life progresses. Do not be stuck in the past but it is okay to carry your loved one with you into your future by thinking how they would have advised you in certain situations or the things they would like.
If you have facing great difficulty with moving on, join a help group or seek the counsel of the therapist. Most importantly, don’t forget to treasure the people who are with you right now.
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Amanda is currently an Organizational Communication student from De La Salle University. Usually found composing songs, reading, writing stories or blogging, she's a girl with a wide range and variety of emotions and a great passion for novelty.
Her lifelong dream is to help make a change in the world, one small step at a time. Can be defined using tons of different opposing adjectives and thus, she calls herself "a paradox in motion." To know more about her quirkiness, check out throughtheparadox.tumblr.com