By Viona Muliru via UN Volunteers
Don’t feed the green eyed monster under your bed and it will go away eventually.
How you ever been so jealous that everything else did not matter to you? Yes, jealousy can blind you. There are two types of jealousy. The jealousy when you feel lust for something that is not yours or envy someone because of who or what someone else is. And then there is the jealousy where you strongly want to protect what or who is yours from others.
The jealousy type which involves protecting what or who you love is healthy, but only if expressed in healthy ways. However, if you become overprotective of the one you love, it is possible that you will appear insecure and they may start to feel trapped in the relationship.
Always remember, just because you are in a relationship with someone does not mean you own them. Relationships should be mutual, where both of you want to stay in it every new day. If you have to build walls around you partner for them not to leave, then that becomes a dictatorship relationship, which is very unhealthy.
To deal with this type of jealousy, talk genuinely to you partner about your feelings without acting like you feel is there fault. Talk about what your partner can do to keep you from feeling jealous without compromising his standards or your relationship. Meet him halfway and lead him to meet you half way so that both of you will be part of improving your relationship.
The second type of jealousy is a dangerous one. It is also called the green eyed monster and I am sure you have felt it sometime in your life. Jealous emotions are negative feelings toward someone else because you want what it is that they have.
This jealousy hinders your personal progress because it affects your ability to focus on yourself and positive emotions that you have potential to build. More than that, jealousy is like a poison that continues to grow if it is constantly fed. This affects emotional wellbeing and the ability to judge situations correct, besides, it is quite a burden to the heart.
If you are constantly jealous of someone else, begin by asking yourself the true reason you are jealous. Knowing why you are feeling jealous will help you to understand who you are and what can trigger negative emotions in you. Talk to a trusted friend or loved one about your struggle with jealousy. Stop justifying your jealousy and stop believing that other people should not be entitled to nice things just because you don’t have them.