What is the 'perfect' body?
Somedays we wake up, look in the mirror and what we see looking back at us is a confident, well-put, and pretty girl.
Then other times it is the total opposite!
We wake up wishing we could change something about ourselves.
A clearer face maybe?
A better-shaped body, perhaps the famous hourglass?
A prettier smile or straight teeth!
Other times may be a personality change, if only we could just be a little bubblier, more outgoing like Jane Doe right?
Sometimes everything, we just wish we could wake up as a new being with all the perfect features.
If only wishes were horses or if only we could make a wish upon an airplane.
We are all so obsessed with what society thinks beautiful is and not being happy with the way we look and not appreciating ourselves. We are usually looking to have the perfect body image, the best smile, a skinny model look, or perfect curves.
Those mental voices in our head tell us "just one more pound", " just one more surgery", and "just a little more makeup" it's always just one more, and we don't realize how much it affects us until we mentally break down.
The truth is no matter the amount of "fixing" we try when we look at our reflection it's never going to be good enough. We mentally break ourselves apart until we fall apart. Trying to live up to the expectations of others or society’s definition of beauty is a recipe for disaster because there is no one definition. Therefore, we must learn to embrace and love ourselves, flaws and all because even the society we are so obsessed with fitting into is divided on what beauty is.
To borrow from Beyoncé's Song – ‘pretty hurts’
Pretty hurts (Pretty hurts) We shine the light on whatever's worst You're tryna fix something But you can't fix what you can't see It's the soul that needs a surgery
Ain't got no doctor, or pill that can take the pain away
The pain's inside, and nobody frees you from your body It's the soul, it's the soul that needs surgery It's my soul that needs surgery
Plastic smiles and denial can only take you so far Then you break when the fake façade leaves you in the dark You left with shattered mirrors And the shards of a beautiful past
We live in a society that is constantly body shaming by placing a lot of emphasis on a person’s outward appearance. We make judgments of people based on how they look. And people work desperately to present an image of perfection when on the inside they are broken, hurt, wounded, and messed up. Perhaps the greatest tragedy of our day is the vast number of people who look alright on the outside but, in reality, it’s all a façade — a mask they put on in order to deceive the world.
The greatest tragedy of our day is the vast number of people who look alright on the outside but, in reality, it’s all a façade.
As Beyoncé laments, the makeup, the nice clothes, and the controlled personality is really an attempt to fix something that we can’t see. It’s not the outside that needs a re-make. It’s the inside — the soul, the part of us that we can’t see — that needs the surgery.
We shouldn’t let society or some woman’s inner thigh gap, long hair, perfectly tatted, skinny or curvy, or whatever we deem as ‘better looking’ feature make us forget what we are.
We are perfect just the way we are. So let us Own it, and help others to do the same. It is our self-confidence that brings the aspiration Beyoncé mentioned, of personal happiness. The true standard of beauty is not defined by society or found in comparing ourselves against others.
No one is perfect. Just remember that everyone is unique and pretty in their own way. Don't hurt yourself trying to look 'pretty'.
Kabuku C Kabwela is an embodiment of multiple skills, talents, and interests that seamlessly merge to create her life, work, and career. She is a Zambian-based trained communication and PR specialist with over 2 years of working experience in marketing and Communications.
Kabuku’s skills include the ability to string words together in the art of creative direction and storytelling, data entry, the ability to multi-task and prioritize projects, content creation and copywriting, basic graphic designing, photography as well as social media management to mention but a few.
Her Hobbies include; crafting, traveling, thrilling adventure, writing, reading, listening to music, and watching series and movies.